Creepy crawlies

Published 1:32 am Sunday, September 20, 2009

Timeless: At 60, an age when most film actresses have either retired or been reduced to grandma roles, Meryl Streep is one of Hollywood’s biggest box-office stars.

Reportedly envious of Streep’s success, Julia Roberts and Angelina Jolie have asked their plastic surgeons to etch crow’s feet at the corners of their eyes, add droop to their jaw lines and induce early-onset menopause.

Thump: Was that a seismic disturbance about 3:45 Saturday afternoon in earthquake-prone Southern California?

No, that was the sound of hundreds of thousands of USC football fans simultaneously collapsing to the floor, struck senseless by the final score of Saturday’s Huskies-Trojans game in Seattle.