Taking way too much license
Published 4:40 pm Friday, June 25, 2010
When Washington, our beloved Evergreen state, needs to feel better about itself, to pull out of misty, recession-colored doldrums, it just needs to look down the coast a ways.
Even as our gray corner tries dipping a timid toe into summer, and recoils, we’re reminded why we prefer grunge to glitz. It’s not that rain is better than sun, just that the harsh economic effects appear more garish under the bright lights of California. For example:
“California electronic license plate would flash ads”: Seeking creative ways to combat a $19 billion budget deficit, the Legislature is pondering a bill to have the state research the use of electronic license plates.
The technology hasn’t been perfected yet, but as long the vehicle is moving, the license plate would appear as a normal plate. Once stopped for more than four seconds, an advertisement would flash, with the plate’s number remaining visible somewhere.
The bill’s author says interested advertisers would contract directly with the DMV.
One company, Smart Plate, is working to develop such an advertorial plate. The company’s chief executive told AP he saw the plates as not just another advertising venue, but as a way to display personalized messages — broadcasting the driver’s allegiance to a sports team or an alma mater.
So, instead of having a personalized plate that merely says “LAKERSFAN” one could have a flashing ad that says “LAKERS RULE” and then enumerate the ways. (There will have to be at least one exemption in the bill, which makes it OK for someone stuck behind a particularly odious flashing ad for more than 30 minutes in a freeway standstill to electronically turn it off, or digitally alter it. Replace Phil Jackson’s smug mug with a Landon Donovan montage, for example.)
Once the technology is there, California will think bigger:
A contract with Twitter seems a natural so one could tweet at traffic stops; QVC could hawk jewelry to the carbound; state vehicle plates could subliminally tell people to speed, and troopers could ticket them; stealth plates could spy on the goings-on in the vehicle behind them; plastic surgeons could flash before and after photos; car dealer plates could blink insults to the vehicles behind them to drum up business. (“Sweet ride! That is one vintage mini-van…); delivery trucks could flash menu items and calorie counts. Really, the possibilities are limitless.
News vehicles could of course flash breaking news headlines, such as this one on Friday: “Gov. Schwarzenegger orders end to cashing welfare debit cards at casinos.”
Low-tech Washington HmSwtHm plates are sounding good.
