The true spirit of the season
Published 8:12 pm Wednesday, December 22, 2010
The heartfelt e-mail arrived 10 days before Christmas, asking if The Herald might do an article about suicide among young people, and how hard the holidays are for those who have lost someone they love.
“I know that this isn’t the most pleasant subject, but at the same time I know there are a lot more readers out there that this will touch than maybe you are even aware of…” the woman wrote.
Because a thoughtful, in-depth news report that the subject deserves would take more time than is available, we’ll try to honor the spirit of her request here. “Although the holidays are to be a joyous time for most, we know that several people will go through the holiday without a loved one or close friend,” the woman wrote. “This year I will be one of those people.”
She lost her stepdaughter, who would have been 20 in November, to suicide a few months ago. Her neighbor’s 31-year-old son killed himself this month, she wrote. She knows of six similar stories that have touched her life.
“What’s happening to our children?” she and others wonder.
The numbers back up her reality — in 2006, suicide was the third leading cause of death for young people ages 15 to 24. But it’s older Americans who are disproportionately likely to die by suicide. It’s a myth, however, that more people commit suicide during the holidays.
With the “why” beyond our scope, let’s focus on her other message: How hard the holidays are for those who have lost family and friends. Let’s add how hard it can be for those who are lonely or depressed.
As these lean times, and every Christmas story ever told, remind us: The spirit of the season is found in simplicity and human connection. Offering words of comfort doesn’t have to be complicated. Giving doesn’t have to cost anything. Small acts can touch others deeply.
Reach out to those who are grieving the death of a loved one. When spoken from the heart, “I’m sorry for your loss” and “I’m thinking of you” convey what there are really no words for. Let somebody know they are not alone. Invite someone in for hot chocolate. Invite the elderly neighbor over for dinner. Talk to a teenager. Send a soldier a letter. Remember those working on the holidays. Encourage someone to share a story about their lost loved one. Give to a food bank in the memory of someone you love. Smile at someone. Be grateful.
The woman’s e-mail concluded: Merry Christmas.
We thank her for reaching out.
