Don’t be cruel

Published 12:01 am Wednesday, August 17, 2011

Don’t Know Much About History — Campaign Edition: Minnesota Congresswoman Michele Bachmann, R-Wikipedia, urged supporters at a rally in Spartanburg, S.C., to wish Elvis Presley a happy birthday on Tuesday. The only problem is that Tuesday was the anniversary of the King of Rock ‘n’ Roll’s death. Presley was born on Jan. 8, 1935. This follows her confusion over Waterloo, Iowa, as the birthplace of John Wayne, when it was serial killer John Wayne Gacy who was born there.

To be fair, Bachmann is only running for president. It’s not like she’s your kids’ history teacher. (For the record, a happy birthday on Tuesday to Madonna, Steve Carrell, Julie Newmar and Eydie Gorme.)

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“Total” fools: A Colorado woman said she was shocked after her dog was hit by a minivan and the driver’s insurance company told her it would pay for two visits to the vet, but after that it would “total” her dog. A Farmer’s Insurance spokesman explained that “totaling out” is just insurance industry jargon.

We hope Farmer’s understands that our use of the term “soulless idiots” is just newspaper industry jargon.

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Don’t Know Much About History — Classic: On this day in 1960, The Beatles began their first gig in Hamburg, West Germany, at the Indra Club.

A very young Michele Bachmann was there to get Mick Jagger’s autograph.

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