Mother, daughter are winning combo on Mavs volleyball court

Published 11:05 pm Tuesday, October 25, 2011

LYNNWOOD — The next few weeks are going to be an emotional time for Meadowdale volleyball coach Machen Shrum.

The Mavericks will honor their five seniors as they play their final home match on Oct. 26. Meadowdale then heads to the district playoffs with a possible fourth straight trip to the state tournament on the line.

For Machen, senior night has an added special meaning because one of the five seniors happens to be her daughter Payton, the team’s all-league setter.

Machen already is anticipating life when Payton heads to college.

“It’s going to be very tough for me when she graduates because we’re real close,” Machen said. “I will be sad to see her go. Senior night is going to be a tough one for mom and coach in that I’ve got five great seniors, but especially the mom part of me.”

The mom part of Machen kept her off the coaching sidelines. The Edmonds School District previously had asked her about returning to coaching, but she repeatedly rebuffed the inquiries. Machen had quit coaching so that she would be able to attend her children’s activities.

Then about six years ago when Payton was in seventh grade, Machen decided the time was right for her to return to coaching. The Shrums recently had moved into the Meadowdale service area.

“The fact that I could come and coach my daughter eventually played a lot in my decision to come to Meadowdale,” Machen said. “That was a big part of it.”

Payton’s freshman year at Meadowdale, however, was somewhat stressful for both mother and daughter.

“I never want to seem partial to my own child and it was very hard her freshman year coming in to know where to put her,” Machen said.

She sought the opinions of her assistant coaches and of the team captains that year in order to make sure the decision was fair. The consensus was that Payton earned a spot on varsity.

Mother and daughter then sat down and had a conversation about setting boundaries between volleyball and home life.

“We really wanted to focus in the gym that she’s my coach,” Payton said. “At home, she’s my mom and trying if there’s frustration at practice, not taking it home and not talking volleyball all the time at home. We wanted to separate that. The same if we had an argument at home or something. We didn’t want to bring it into the gym and have it affect the way I played or how she was feeling. All four years it’s worked really well. We haven’t had any major problems.”

It helps that both mother and daughter agree they both have fairly easy-going personalities.

“We have tried the best we can the past four years to leave it at the gym and when we get home come back to mother and daughter,” Machen said. “It doesn’t always work, but I think we’ve had a pretty good balance.

“It’s really been a lot easier than I thought it was going to be.”

Having your mother as your coach does have some drawbacks, according to Payton, who is looking to continue her volleyball career in college.

It’s difficult when someone knows you so well.

“Sometimes I feel like she kind of can read my face and know exactly what I’m trying to hide,” Payton said. “She can kind of call it out easier than some people. … She knows right away the look in my face. She knows what it is.”

Payton has been trying to work on her game face, so that if she misses a ball or has a problem, she can just shake it off.

Machen doesn’t hesitate to ask assistant coach Tricia Barlette to provide feedback to her daughter.

“There are those times I can get a daughter response from her to something I’ve said versus a player’s response,” Machen said.

The difference might be that a player would look at Machen in the eyes and say “OK. I understand,” while a daughter might roll her eyes and say “Yeah, I get it.”

Through the years, Payton has been receptive to her comments, Machen said. “It’s just those few times where somebody else needs to step in. I think in life, you’ve got teachers who teach different ways and reach kids in different ways. It’s the same thing out here.”

During the fall, Machen and Payton spend lot of time together. From the time Payton gets home from school until she goes to bed, the two are with each other. Machen also makes Payton’s lunch in the morning and gets her off to school.

“She’s in charge of me all the time,” Payton said. “I don’t have a problem with it at all. We have a really good relationship. It’s fun because other times of the year I get really busy with club volleyball. If I’m doing track too, I don’t see her as much. It’s really nice just to be together a lot.”