Beware: We’re ot worki g with a fully fu ctio al keyboard

Published 9:01 pm Thursday, May 6, 2010

We’re worki g u der a bit of a ha dicap to ight. (Please hold the jokes.)

The letter ” ” has broke off the keyboard o my laptop. It’s probably because of the heavy amou t of typi g from the past few days give all the ews about Mari ers outfielder Milto Bradley.

Would ‘t you k ow it, amo g all the letters i the ames of the Mari ers’ starters to ight, the most-used letter is the letter ” “.

So to the editors back at the office, ha g with me to ight. A d to the readers, tomorrow’s ewspaper sould be i teresti g.

I a sick sort of way, this remi ds me of o e of my favorite Mo ty Pytho comedy routi es, which goes like this:

Mr. Smoketoomuch: I saw your advert in the blassified ads.

Mr. Bounder: The what?

Mr. Smoketoomuch: In The Times Blassified Ads.

Mr. Bounder: Ah, The Times Classified Ads.

Mr. Smoketoomuch: Yes, that’s right. I’m afraid I have a speech impediment. I can’t pronounce the letter B.

Mr. Bounder: Uh, C.

Mr. Smoketoomuch: Yes, that’s right, B. It’s all due to a trauma I suffered when I was a sboolboy. I was attacked by a Siamese bat.

Mr. Bounder: Uh, ah, a Siamese cat.

Mr. Smoketoomuch: No, a Siamese bat. They’re more dangerous.

Mr. Bounder: Listen, can you say the letter K?

Mr. Smoketoomuch: Oh, yes. Khaki, kettle, Kipling, Khomeini, Kellog’s Born Flakes.

Mr. Bounder: Well, why don’t you say the letter K instead of the letter C?

Mr. Smoketoomuch: What, you mean, pronounce “blassified” with a K?

Mr. Bounder: Yes, absolutely!

Mr. Smoketoomuch: Klassified!

I wish it were that easy.

The e d.