Arlington father’s essay celebrates a son with autism

Published 10:55 pm Thursday, June 12, 2008

James Wilson has a favorite subject at Arlington’s Haller Middle School. It’s P.E.

He has chores at home, taking out trash and emptying the dishwasher. He likes Coca-Cola, Nintendo Wii video games and going to the grocery store.

James also loves going to baseball games with his dad. What kid wouldn’t? It’s all pretty typical for a boy of 14.

In many ways, he’s like most kids his age, but James is not a typical teen. He has autism.

“When you’ve got a kid like this, he can’t express himself,” said Jay Wilson, James’ father. “I want people to know about this kid. He’s such a neat kid.”

Wilson recently jumped at the chance to both brag about his boy and give James a once-in-a-lifetime thrill: to throw out a ceremonial first pitch at a Seattle Mariners game. That was the prize in an essay contest sponsored by Autism Speaks, an autism awareness organization.

On May 7, before the Mariners hosted the Texas Rangers, James stepped onto Safeco Field. Standing in front of home plate, nervous as any kid would be, he pitched a ball to the father who always sees him as a winner.

Jay Wilson will never forget that throw, part of the Mariners’ second annual Autism Awareness Night.

“He understood exactly what was going on. I was trying to keep his focus, but all of a sudden he was looking all over the place,” said Wilson. “I was thinking, this kid’s nervous. I got his focus — ‘C’mon, man, we’ve talked about this. You get one chance.’ It was funny. He walked out there, he knew what he had to do, and what he wanted to do.”

Wilson said as James walked off the field, his face said it all, relief that it was over and pride that he’d done it. “He was so happy,” Wilson said.

Wilson’s prize-winning essay is about baseball. It begins with his first look at his newborn son on Nov. 4, 1993, and the thought that because the baby had big hands he surely had the makings of a Major League player. It ends with Wilson celebrating the incremental success that allows him now to take James to ball games, beginning with the Everett AquaSox and now to the “big show,” the Seattle Mariners.

“Thank you, God, for my Baseball Buddy,” Wilson’s essay ends.

Susan Barlet, co-president with her husband, Mark, of the Northwest chapter of Autism Speaks, said Wilson’s essay was selected from about seven entered. Each one described what autism has meant for a family. “I’m glad I wasn’t the judge,” said Barlet, of Sumner, whose teen granddaughter is autistic.

Wilson’s essay tells of James being diagnosed with autism at age 5, after tests at the University of Washington. For Wilson and his wife, Carrie, that diagnosis began a life of learning all they could about a disorder that impairs the ability to communicate and relate to people. Autism symptoms can be mild to severe; those affected often have rigid routines and repetitive behaviors.

Carrie Wilson said their son has an individualized plan at Haller Middle School, where he takes regular music and other elective classes, but his academics are adapted for his special needs. This year, he turned out for track. He went to shortened practices and participated in the 100-yard dash and shot put.

“The kids have accepted him as a member of the team. He hasn’t always been this high functioning,” said Carrie Wilson, recalling that when James was little he would sometimes grab or scratch other kids. “It’s been a long haul,” she said.

There’s more to that essay than a father’s love for his son and baseball. It’s about the evolution of a dream.

“As a father, right away you have big dreams for your kid. You’d love him to do this or that, be a baseball player or whatever,” Wilson said. “As time went on, things kind of changed.”

The Wilsons’ older child, 15-year-old daughter Ginny, plays basketball and soccer at Arlington High School. At first, her brother had trouble at her basketball games because of the buzzer and big crowds.

“You just find things that interest him,” Wilson said. “With baseball, there’s the AquaSox mascot. A big thing at Mariner games is popcorn. The kid loves to eat. You get him involved. He started looking forward to going to games.”

The Wilsons haven’t let go of expectations. With his parents’ involvement, James trained to be an altar server at Immaculate Conception Catholic Church in Arlington. After years of taking his boy swimming every weekend, Wilson said James is an accomplished swimmer.

“You’ve just got to keep working. Rewards will come,” Wilson said. “It’s not whether he’s a baseball player or he’s going to be the mayor. Your kid is your kid, no matter what.”

Reading between the lines, I saw a word missing in that essay, although it’s there in abundance: patience.

“He does have patience,” Carrie Wilson said. “He really is a great dad.”

Columnist Julie Muhlstein: 425-339-3460 or muhlstein@heraldnet.com.

Read dad’s essay on HeraldNet

To read the essay Jay Wilson wrote about his son for the Autism Speaks organization, go to cmg-northwest2.go-vip.net/heraldnet.

For more information about the Autism Speaks program, go to www.autismspeaks.org.