Don’t monkey with an orangutan

Maybe it was shy. An angry orangutan at a wildlife sanctuary in Malaysia pulled off a tourist’s backpack, pants, shoes and socks Sunday after the woman took its picture, perhaps indicating it was uncomfortable being photographed in the nude.

Here are a few other tidbits about orangutans:

They mostly eat fruit and other plants, which means that if they were people, they might like some of the fresh squash appearing at local produce stands. Unlike people, however, young orangutans will actually eat produce when their parents give it to them.

They’re intelligent and semi-solitary, sort of like the guys in a computer club at WSU that’s planning a “nerd auction,” in which members will offer their tech skills to sorority girls in exchange for a makeover and — they hope — a date. The guys would have it easier if they were apes — then all they’d have to do to get a girl is bellow.

Males are very large, very strong and sometimes aggressive, kind of like two of the Seahawks’ offensive linemen, who have each lifted more than 500 pounds on the bench press. You probably don’t want to make them angry, either.