Family caregivers make hard choices; film tells their story
Published 11:16 pm Tuesday, February 5, 2008
Most any family may relate to “Wally,” a documentary by psychiatrist and photographer Robert Fink, about the agony of deciding where a disabled man will live when his parents die.
It hits home with anyone needing to place a loved one in a safe environment.
“It is a difficult and bizarre story in some ways,” said Fink, 59. “This was a difficult situation for everyone. There was no right answer. No matter what was decided, someone was going to be unhappy.”
Fink spent three years filming Wally Meyer, 60, a Lake Stevens man with cerebral palsy, whose parents died within a year of one another. Fink said filmmaking was his unfulfilled passion.
Fink treated Meyer’s sister for 10 years before discovering her dilemma with her brother, Wally. Meyer’s sister had to make decisions for her brother, after promising her father she would take care of her brother the rest of his life.
“This is the type of situation we all have had to face and hope we will never have to face again,” Fink said. “Our hope is that, in time, the decision we make will be seen as the right one, the one that leads everyone involved to change for the better.”
Many have seen the documentary, shown at film festivals around the country. The story is told mostly through relatives and friends of the Meyer family.
Fink, president of the class of 1970 at Stanford University, uses period music and old photographs to capture a sense of time and place.
The film will resonate with parents, siblings and other caregivers involved with long-term care of a family member who has a disability, said Michelle Dietz-Date, resource development manager with Village Community Services in Arlington. VCS’s Family Relations committee is hosting the event.
VCS offers residential and vocational training and support services to people with disabilities. After the film, a panel of experts will discuss issues raised in the program.
Near the end of the documentary, Meyer says life “sucks” for the disabled.
View the documentary to see if his plight is resolved.
Columnist Kristi O’Harran: 425-339-3451 or oharran@heraldnet.com.
