Ham on wry

Published 5:30 pm Friday, January 8, 2016

Ham on wry

My baloney has a second name; it’s T, R, U, M, P: Workers at a Vermont deli near where Donald Trump appeared at a campaign rally say they didn’t sell any of the sandwich specials that were created in his honor. The sandwich — bologna on white bread with American cheese, lettuce, tomato, bacon and mustard — was on the menu for $20.16 (Page Ax).

Maybe they should have included a soft drink with it; it’s hard to swallow even a little bit of Trump’s baloney.

Welcome to the 1 percent: We’ve helpfully provided some financial advice to whoever wins the $800 million Powerball on Saturday. Even after taxes and with conservative investments, you could live off the $10.5 million in annual interest pretty comfortably (Page A7).

That’s enough to hire your own personal joke writer, and you’d still have $10 million for living expenses.

Don’t know much about history: On this day in 1916, the World War I Battle of Gallipoli ended as Allied forces withdrew, resulting in a victory for the Ottoman Empire (Today in History, Page C8).

But the victory was only temporary, as is obvious today in every American living room, when the Recliner Empire overwhelming usurped the Ottomans.

—Jon Bauer, Herald staff