COUPEVILLE — It’s the perfect pandemic pad, and then some.
This place keeps you safe from earthquakes, nosy neighbors and the zombie apocalypse.
What’s up with that?
You’ll never run out of toilet paper or food on the super-stocked 60-acre compound on the market for $6 million.
It includes a move-in-ready safe house with bulletproof walls and a garage with bays for five 18-wheeled semi-trucks to unload.
“If the grid went down tomorrow, you’d have enough to keep all of your luxuries and amenities and toiletries going for a long, long time,” said selling agent Forbes Hansen of American Dream Real Estate, based in Anacortes.
Tanks store 17,000 gallons of propane and 3,300 gallons of gas and diesel. There are four wells and a 53,600-gallon water storage silo. A communications shelter protects electronics.
The secluded property starts near Highway 525 and stretches to the coast, where it edges 860 feet of waterfront.
The main house, built in 1994, is nice but no mansion. It has only two bedrooms and 2.5 bathrooms and is tucked in the trees with no water view. The walls are concrete reinforced with helix metal fiber.
“This seemingly normal two-story home is an easily defended fortress from the skies,” Hansen says in the listing video. “It is over-engineered for the preservation of life.”
Need to get away fast?
“A tunnel allows egress in the event of emergency, to an unknown location,” he said.
This almost sounds like something from a James Bond movie.
The fantasy island bunker is 20 miles north of the Clinton ferry terminal and 20 miles south of Naval Air Station Whidbey.
It’s five minutes to a plaza with Greenbank Pantry and Deli, a U.S. Post Office and The Weed Shop. Another bonus: you can leave home 15 minutes before showtime to nab a good spot at the Blue Fox Drive-In in south Oak Harbor.
Hansen requested the seller’s identity not be released, though it has been revealed in other stories. The address is undisclosed on the real estate listing.
It’s not like you can get close enough to see anything. A chained barrier gate with “keep out” signs on the private drive is a major buzzkill for lookie-loos.
Prove you can afford it and you can get a showing. If not, sit back and enjoy the video on www.forbeshansen.com or instagram @forbeshansen.
“I’m not aware of any on the market like this,” Hansen said.
Possibilities abound. There’s a buildable lot for a dream home with killer views. It also could be used for recreation or a farm, a camp, commune or cult.
A story on the local blog animals24-7.org suggests: “Most of Greenbank would probably happily settle for just an aging punk rocker or heavy metal star, who might patronize the local marijuana store, hide from paparazzi, and not shoot anything at anyone.”
The closest recently sold comp is a $5.4 million luxury home on 21 acres a few miles away, on Smugglers Cove Road near Lagoon Point in Freeland. It went for $500,000 below asking price and didn’t have bulletproof walls. A nearby Smugglers Cove home is currently for sale for $4.3 million.
Both lack the accoutrements of the Coupeville compound.
This spread has three irrigated orchards with 100 fruit trees, greenhouses and a chicken coop.
A 9,000-square-foot shop houses an office, workshop, fitness center, his-and-her locker rooms with showers and a kitchen equipped to feed 50 people.
A cabin near the beach sleeps a dozen people.
The caretaker home has high-end finishes. “Two skilled caretakers have been working on the property for 17 years,” Hansen said.
They don’t come with the purchase.
Can you afford it?
Asking price: $5,999,950
20% down: $1,199,990
Balance due: $4,799,951
Monthly payment at 2.75% mortgage rate on 30-year loan: $19,595, principal and interest
Andrea Brown: email@example.com; 425-339-3443. Twitter @reporterbrown.