Capisce?

Published 3:17 pm Sunday, November 30, 2014

Are you looking at my GDP? The prime minister of the Caribbean nation of Antigua and Barbuda has appointed actor Robert De Niro, star of “Taxi Driver” and “Godfather II,” as special economic envoy, noting that De Niro will be able to attract investment and celebrities to the nation.

De Niro assured the prime minister: “Ask your friends in the neighborhood about me. They’ll tell you I know how to return a favor.”

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Blow, don’t inhale: Researchers at Washington State University are working on a breath test to determine if drivers are under the influence of marijuana.

Not to get too technical, but the marijuana exam tests for the presence of molecules of Doritos or Mountain Dew.

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Channel-surfing the vast cultural wasteland: The true meaning of Christmas is celebrated in the CW network’s “Greatest Holiday Commercials Countdown” at 9 tonight.

OK. The holiday commercials were kind of boring, so the show’s producers used digital special effects to put Santa hats on everybody in old Super Bowl commercials.

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