Let the countdown begin.

The pillow fight on the Palouse is only five days away.

That’s right folks, it’s Apple Cup week in Washington.

Last year’s Apple Cup was a historic one, the 100th meeting between Washington and Washington State. The 101st version of the Apple Cup will be historic in its own right as well, as two of the country’s worst Division I programs battle to see just who is the worst team in the Pac-10.

For the first time since 1969, the Huskies and Cougars come into an Apple Cup with one win and zero conference wins between them. For what it’s worth, Washington won that game 30-21 for its first win of the season as both teams finished 1-9.

The fine folks who handicap sports in Las Vegas seem to think that the 2008 Apple Cup will end in similar fashion. Despite the fact that the Huskies have lost 12 straight, including all 10 games this season, they were installed as an 8.5 point favorite over WSU Sunday evening.

While this Apple Cup week promises to provide plenty of comedy, it will likely be devoid of the playful trash talk that makes this week so entertaining. What player or fan of either team is going to pop off this week? What is there to say?

So does anyone care about this game? Sure. I, for one, am more interested in this game than I would be if both teams had two or three wins. If it’s going to be a crappy game, it might as well be a historically crappy one, right?

The Huskies and Cougars are so bad that their combined ineptitude has become a national story, getting attention over the last couple of weeks from the likes of ESPN and USA Today.

“I’m really embarrassed by both programs right now,” Washington center Juan Garcia said following his team’s loss to USC, which means he must now be feeling two weeks worth of extra embarrassment for the two programs.

“Just for the state of Washington I wish that either one of the programs was pretty good,” he continued. “I always root for the Cougars when I’m not playing against them. We’re going to play them in the Apple Cup, and I always wondered how cool it would have been if when we played the Cougars were undefeated and we were undefeated and was imagining stuff like that, but I never imagined this. Going and playing them, they (stink) and we (stink). It’s going to be the rotten apple I guess. I don’t know.”

Cougars and Huskies undefeated? Cue the corny sitcom laugh track.

No, both these programs are very defeated. They’re defeated pretty much every time they take the field (Washington State’s win over Division I-AA Portland State notwithstanding). And these teams don’t just lose, they lose with authority.

Washington has been outscored 39.9 to 13.9 this season, and out-gained 453.4 to 263.5. Yet somehow, according to the numbers and the oddsmakers, that doesn’t even qualify the Huskies for “worst team in the state” status.

Nope, hand that trophy to the boys in Crimson who, even with their 48-9 win over Portland State factored in, have been outscored by an average margin of 48.5 to 12.6 this season. Washington State opponents are averaging 460.3 yards per game against the Cougars total of 236.36. In Wazzu’s eight conference losses, they’ve allowed 60 or more points four times and 58 or more six. The Cougars had a 280-game scoring streak going this season that dated back to 1984, but they’ve now been shut out three times in their past four games.

So here’s the real question about the Apple Cup: What happens when a defense so used to getting steamrolled faces an offense that hasn’t been able to move the ball all season? Seriously, which wins? Both teams are so bad on both sides of the ball, it will be fascinating to see who wins what battles.

“They’re going to give it their best shot just because it’s Apple Cup,” UW linebacker Mason Foster said. ‘They’re going to come with their best stuff, just like we’re going to come with our best stuff. It’s going to be a good game.”

WSU’s best stuff against Washington’s best stuff? Well that should be some interesting, um, stuff.

The countdown is on. Apple Cup 2008 is only five days away. Who’s excited?

Anyone?

Herald Writer John Boyle: jboyle@heraldnet.com. For more on UW sports, check out the Huskies blog at heraldnet.com /huskiesblog