Acts of kindness comfort family of girl killed at Big Four Ice Caves

MARYSVILLE — Every day, John Tam still says, “Good morning, Gracie,” to his daughter who no longer sits at the table for breakfast.

In the evening, he wishes her a good night.

The pain has not subsided since falling ice at the Big Four Ice Caves claimed his 11-year-old daughter’s life.

He thinks about Grace constantly.

“I want the world to know what happened and that she is loved,” Tam said.

Grace Tam died July 31 from crushing pelvic injuries after she was struck by a huge chunk of ice as she stood about 15 to 17 feet in front of a cave.

For two hours, the family waited for help near the caves in the Mount Baker-Snoqualmie National Forest east of Granite Falls. Nurses who were hiking nearby did their best to keep Grace alive, but she died before rescuers could get her to a hospital.

What has helped Tam and his family in their grief is the kindness of others, including friends, neighbors and strangers. In various ways, Tam said, they are helping to honor his daughter.

Chris Smith of Bothell set up a website in Grace’s memory. It can be found at pnwhikes.com/grace/.

Smith, an avid hiker, had not met the Tams before the accident. He has his own hiking website and initially contacted Tam to see about including a link for a memorial fund.

Not long afterward, Smith met with the Tams at a Snohomish Starbucks to talk about setting up the website. It includes a memorial video, ways to donate to Grace’s favorite cause — she loved animals — some of her writings and suggested safety improvements the Tams would like to see at the ice caves.

“They are trying to be constructive,” Smith said. “It’s one of the hardest things anyone could ever have to do.”

Members of a local motorcycle group hosted a fundraiser in Grace’s memory.

Neighbors near the Tam home east of Marysville plan to build a bench near a pond where Grace would walk her dog, Sugar, every day.

The Tams also are paying to publish a book of Grace’s writings. All proceeds will go to groups that help neglected animals.

In fact, each month the family plans to make a donation in Grace’s memory to the Humane Society for Seattle and King County. Grace dreamed of opening a shelter for abused and neglected animals.

Tam also has been working to set up a time to talk with rangers from the Mount Baker-Snoqualmie National Forest about changes being considered near the ice caves.

It’s common practice to review ways to make a popular hiking destination safer after a death or major accident, officials said.

Tam wants to see improved warning signs and a clearly marked area telling hikers where they should and shouldn’t go, to help them avoid danger.

Ultimately, he wants an adjustable fence around the caves and more ranger presence in the area.

“If they are going to let the public go up there, they need to protect the public,” he said.

Tam also wants to see training and reliable medical equipment in the hands of rural fire districts, as well as a more dependable and accessible communication system in areas where cell phone reception is spotty. Poor reception hampered efforts to get Grace medical help.

“If help got there early enough, I think Grace would be alive today,” he said.

The Tams have faced many heartaches since Grace’s death.

They had to find out how to distribute the college fund they had set up and contributed to in her name since her birth. Her college was paid for and the credits will go to Grace’s younger brother and extended family.

They decided not to wash the sheets in Grace’s bed to keep her smell as long as they can.

They soon will plant a tree that will produce purple leaves because purple was Grace’s favorite color.

As fall approaches, they look forward to watching another tree, this one a maple, shed its leaves.

“Every year, she loved the changing colors,” Tam said. “Gracie loved it always.”

Eric Stevick: 425-339-3446; stevick@heraldnet.com.

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