Can’t be satisfied

In an effort to make its employees feel like their contributions are valued, Google gave a 10 percent pay raise to all 23,300 of them.

Human nature being what it is, there’s got to be at least one disgruntled Google worker who whined that the pay raise did not come with a “Celebrate Success!” commemorative coffee mug this year.

Not rock ‘n’ roll high school: High school students in Forks, setting of the “Twilight” teen vampire novels and movies, were suspended for wearing T-shirts bearing the name of the 1970s punk band the Sex Pistols.

The suspended students are welcome to transfer to The Buzz High School, as long as they abide by our “Twilight” zero-tolerance policy.

Programming note: A CBS program called “48 Hours Mystery” plans a segment about Colton Harris-Moore, the alleged “barefoot bandit” who was indicted Wednesday. Producers say the show will quote an anonymous source who claims that Harris-Moore believes that a higher power saved him from crashing the planes he allegedly stole.

CBS executives also are contacting their higher power in hopes that someone will tune in at 10 p.m. Saturday to watch the thing.

— Mark Carlson, Herald writer