Friends in low places

Jon Bauer, Herald staff

Flush with advice: Michigan safety officials have a new way of encouraging people, men at least, not to drink and drive when they’ve been out at taverns: talking urinal cakes. The deodorizing urinal cakes play a message, in a friendly woman’s voice, reminding men to call a cab or a friend to get home safely.

But The Buzz thinks there’s a fatal flaw with this plan: Any guy who’s been drinking isn’t going to have the aim necessary to “activate” the urinal cake.

Tie me kangaroo down, sport: Drivers in Pasco were startled Saturday to see a kangaroo hopping down a state highway. Police corralled the marsupial until the owner could come and claim his exotic pet.

Drivers who were on their way home from local bars said they would listen the next time a urinal cake told them to call a cab.

God said, “Ha!” Scientists in Switzerland using the world’s largest atom smasher say they have found strong evidence of the Higgs boson, or “God particle,” an elusive speck that could help explain how the universe works.

But scientists were disappointed that when they cracked open the “God particle” it only reminded them to call a cab if they had had too much to drink.