Kennedy on himself: ‘I am an enjoyer’

“The graveyards of the world,” Charles de Gaulle once said, “are filled with indispensable men.”

The eloquent shrug of Gallic irony aside, the living do walk away, even from the graves of the great and good, and history — which is life in the aggregate — simply goes on. Yet it does no justice to the living or the dead to pretend that some losses do not diminish us in ways that impoverish our collective experience and strip away a bit of life’s savor.

Sen. Edward M. Kennedy’s recent death was such a loss, and “True Compass” ($35), his touchingly candid, big-hearted and altogether superb memoir, demonstrates precisely why.

Completed in the shadow of the senator’s own mortality, this is a book whose clarity of recollection and expression entitles it to share in the lineage established by America’s first great memoir of public life — “The Autobiography of U.S. Grant,” which he wrote while dying of cancer.

In the weeks leading up to the publication of “True Compass,” much of the obvious “news” in this book was leaked to the media, particularly his bitter regrets over his “inexcusable” behavior during the Chappaquiddick tragedy, the night of heavy drinking that resulted in rape allegations against one of his nephews, and the failure of his first marriage. What’s far more remarkable about this memoir is its capacious and generous spirit.

In some sense, conscious of the fact that the three older brothers he so deeply admired never lived to set down their own recollections, the youngest Kennedy brother has written a portrait of his extraordinary family, as well as an account of his own eventful life.

There’s something extraordinary — and deeply affecting — about the affection expressed for Joe and Rose Kennedy, despite a childhood lived under circumstances which, while economically privileged, many today would consider harsh, demanding and, in ways, even abusive.

Yet no word of reproach escapes the youngest son, who loved them both to the end. There’s a section on his maternal grandfather, the legendary Boston mayor Honey Fitz, that political junkies will savor. The colorful, canny old man’s influence on Ted long has been underestimated, and many of the gifts that made the senator so effective and well-liked on both sides of the aisle descended through the Fitzgerald line and through careful observation of the old fox at work.

There’s that sort of nonpartisan generosity of spirit in Kennedy’s appraisal of the presidents with whom he worked. He esteems Lyndon B. Johnson as the greatest president since Franklin D. Roosevelt, while lamenting the indelible stain the Vietnam debacle left on his reputation.

He clearly disliked Jimmy Carter, whom he charges with a pettiness and the genuine politician’s greatest sin — a failure “to listen.” He found Ronald Reagan gracious and charming and remained Nancy’s fast friend, admired both Clintons and enjoyed George W. Bush’s sense of humor, while finding Laura Bush a first lady of real grace and poise.

There’s a wonderful self- appraisal: “I am an enjoyer. I have enjoyed being a senator; I’ve enjoyed my children and my close friends; I’ve enjoyed books and music and well-prepared food, especially with a generous helping of cream sauce on the top. I have enjoyed the company of women. I have enjoyed a stiff drink or two or three, and I’ve relished the smooth taste of a good wine. At times, I’ve enjoyed these pleasures too much.”

There’s a kind of invocation — a spell, if you will — against melancholy in that summary, for much of this memoir, affectionate though it remains, is haunted by loss: of family, friends, comrades, opportunities.

In his life’s final chapter, Kennedy seemed to have found the ultimate shield against the darkness in the loving relationship he enjoyed with his second wife, Vicki, a Southern-born lawyer of Lebanese heritage with two young children, whom the much older senator clearly adored.

If one were pressed to tease an epitaph for Ted Kennedy from the pages, the process would have to begin with the recognition that he unselfconsciously cast his own life as a story of interlocking loves — for life, his family, his church, his Irish heritage, his Democratic Party and its policies, for the U.S. Senate and for American politics.