Why is it that I glance a few moments at CNN’s telecast of O.J.’s hearing, mentally pump my fists and yell “wheeee?”
Why is it that I secretly laugh at Martina Hingis’ claims that she doesn’t want to fight her positive cocaine test and retire instead?
Why is it that I find myself smirking and giggling at every piece of hate e-mail I get from UW football fanatics, infuriated that I dare mention that the right thing to do might just be to retain coach Ty Willingham and all — repeat, ALL — of his assistants?
Why do I think the best job for Clay Bennett is a clown in the Ellensburg Rodeo?
Why am I rooting for Barry Bonds, Roger Clemens, Jose Guillen, Sammy Sosa and the entire field of the Tour de France to retire and go into the urinalysis biz?
Why don’t I care about alleged match-dumping and bribery in men’s tennis?
Why do I strongly suspect that every professional and upper-echelon college athlete after 1980 is on steroids, HGH or teched-up Flintstone vitamins?
Why do I wish Terrell Owens would retire and hook up with Britney Spears?
Why do I look at my paychecks and am fairly certain I’m stealing from The Herald because I’m having too much fun at what’s supposed to be work?
Why am I writing this stuff?
Talk to us
> Give us your news tips.
> Send us a letter to the editor.
> More Herald contact information.
