While Dwight Eisenhower was president, “The Ed Sullivan Show” was must-see TV, the laser was invented and Patty Haroski dreamed up National Boss’s Day.
She did so, she explained, because she loved her boss at the Deerfield, Ill., offices of State Farm Insurance where she was a secretary. It made no difference that her boss was her father. Haroski thought there should be a date when Americans honor their bosses.
So on every Oct. 16 since 1958, Haroski’s Boss’s Day vision has given Americans the chance to decide whether the person they report to merits honor, contempt or something in between.
Managers, by their very nature, should not approach their job with the ultimate goal of winning a popularity contest and scoring a cool card, a vase of vibrant flowers or the chance to be wined and dined by employees on or around Oct. 16.
Bosses, conventional wisdom argues, are supposed to get the most out of their employees, drive their departments to help the company make money, be fair, be square and, by all means, accomplish it all under budget.
Sadly, despite a plethora of self-help “how to manage better with compassion and understanding” books, too many bosses today remain transfixed on bossing rather than coaching their employees.
Having studied the behaviors of more than 2,000 managers in 38 years, Leo Weidner believes that bosses can have it both ways. They can be popular, yet respected, and can be honored on Oct. 16 while achieving unimagined productivity from their employees.
“Too many bosses, even today, remain wholly focused on work, on the goal of making as much money as possible that they turn into stressed-out autocrats who see their employees more as objects than people,” said Weidner, a work-life balance coach and author of “Achieving the Balance” (Lifebalance Institute Press, 2004).
“Most bosses think of themselves as ‘money-making machines’ whose sole purpose in life is to advance the business,” Weidner said. “The inherent disconnect is that when any of their employees talk to them, the employees don’t give a rip about the business, they’re just trying to improve their working life.”
As a coach, Weidner gets wayward bosses to shift their thinking and their behavior from focusing on themselves and the business to balancing their own lives while meeting the needs of their employees, who eventually have the power to make the boss a hero or a goat.
“We try to eliminate the destructive mental models that have been with people since birth – that men are dominant both at home and the workplace, that the more time put in at work the more successful you’ll be, and that money is the ultimate measure of success.”
Instead, he urges clients to cut their workweek by a third, spend more time in activities they enjoy, strengthen family and personal relationships, and learn how destructive behaviors as smoking, too much alcohol, drugs or overwork heightens rather than reduces stress.
“Before they can learn to like their employees, they must learn to like themselves,” said Weidner from his Salt Lake City office.
Once a personal transformation is achieved, Weidner urges bosses to change the manager-employee dynamic from “I am boss, do as I say” to “We are a team, and I am your coach here to help you.”
He suggests that managers first get employees to write (in detail) their own job description. Then, in periodic (weekly is best), one-on-one meetings, have employees describe how they specifically accomplished their work objectives since the last meeting.
“As they go through the process, find ways to praise them for their specific efforts. If something arises that may need changing, bring up the topic as constructively as possible,” he said.
Near the end of the meeting, Weidner convinces bosses to sincerely ask three questions of employees: “Is there anything I can do to make things better here for you? Is there anyone or any policy here causing a problem for you? Overall, how are things going for you?”
If asked sincerely and with obvious care for the individual, the answers often can elicit a treasurer trove of information that can lead to an overall improved work environment.
Who knows, maybe on Oct. 16, 2005, more bosses will find cards, flowers and dinner invitations flowing their way as productivity from employees who know they care rises substantially.
Write Eric Zoeckler at The Herald, P.O. Box 930, Everett, WA 98206 or e-mail mrscribe@aol.com.
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