No doubt about it, Boston doesn’t stand a chance

Caution: The writer of this column grew up near St. Louis and is a fervent Cardinals fan. Despite his attempt to remain neutral in analyzing the Cardinals-Red Sox matchup in the World Series, he can hardly contain his joy about St. Louis’ presence in the Fall Classic, let alone his obvious Cardinals bias.

The World Champion Red Sox? Please, don’t make me laugh.

Forget any notion that The Curse is broken or that fate finally has run out of better things to shine upon than Johnny Damon’s hair.

I’ll give them one victory at Fenway.

Yes, the Red Sox are the popular choice. You love them because they beat the hated Yankees; because they’ve endured 86 years of frustration since they last won the Series; because they’re a grimy-looking bunch of characters – Damon, Manny Ramirez, Pedro Martinez, Curt Schilling – who need a hair stylist.

And there’s the charm of an Everett connection with the Red Sox. Third baseman Bill Mueller, left-handed relief specialist Mike Myers and closer Keith Foulke all began their pro baseball careers with the Everett Giants.

The Red Sox are a powerful team.

They said the ‘67 Sox were pretty stout, too. With guys named Carl Yastrzemski, Rico Petrocelli, George Scott, Tony Conigliaro and Jim Lonborg, Boston won 92 games and the American League title.

Then the Cardinals threw Bob Gibson at them and won the Series in seven games.

That Cardinals lineup was loaded, with five future Hall of Famers – Gibson, Steve Carlton, Orlando Cepeda, Lou Brock and manager Red Schoendienst – along with Curt Flood, a talented center fielder whose greatest impact occurred off the field three years later. In 1970, he challenged baseball’s reserve clause all the way to the Supreme Court, spawning free agency and the salary structure that exists today.

Enough about how the Cards beat the Red Sox 37 years ago. Here’s how they’ll match up against the Red Sox and beat them again in 2004:

* Starting pitching: More than Martinez and Schilling, the Red Sox are blessed with Derek Lowe and Tim Wakefield (when his knuckleball is dancing). The Cardinals don’t have any household names, just solid starters in Woody Williams, Jeff Suppan, Jason Marquis and Matt Morris. On paper, the Red Sox have a decidedly better starting staff. Remember, baseball is played on grass.

Edge: Cardinals, of course.

* Relief pitching: If the Cardinals’ starters can last seven innings, they will allow manager Tony LaRussa to avoid using the softest part of his team, the middle relievers. Kiko Calero, Danny Haren, Cal Eldred and Ray King are no match for Boston’s Alan Embree, Curtis Leskanic, Bronson Arroyo and Mike Timlin.

Then there are the closers. Keith Foulke of the Red Sox allowed only one hit and no runs in six innings of work against the Yankees. Jason Isringhausen blew two saves against the Astros, and he’s best when he pitches only one inning per game.

Edge: I’m nervous on this one, but I’m going with – who else? – the Cardinals.

* Offense: The Cardinals’ challenge is simple. Keep Damon off the bases, Ramirez and David Ortiz in the ballpark, and Bill Mueller and Jason Varitek from plugging the outfield gaps.

The Cardinals will hammer the Red Sox with a one-through-five that’s no less than what they saw from the Yankees – Tony Womack, Larry Walker, Albert Pujols, Scott Rolen and Jim Edmonds. I hope there’s enough room on the hand-operated scoreboard at Fenway for all the runs that’ll be scored in this series.

Edge: Hmmm, let’s see. I’ll go with the Cardinals.

* Defense: The Cardinals have made one error the entire postseason, the Red Sox two. These teams catch and throw the ball well.

The defensive difference is so small that it might come down to the catching. Few catchers in baseball can block a pitch in the dirt like the Cardinals’ Mike Matheny. Boston’s Jason Varitek will be challenged immediately, trying to catch Wakefield’s knuckleballs today in Game 1. He spent nearly as much time chasing them to the backstop in the one inning he tried to catch Wakefield against the Yankees.

Edge: El-birdos, naturally.

* Intangibles: St. Louis manager Tony LaRussa has more big-game experience than Boston’s Terry Francona. … While nobody should overestimate the effect Fenway Park has on the Red Sox, the same is true of Busch Stadium. The Cardinals haven’t lost a postseason game there, where the sea of red-clad fans makes a difference. … I grew up near St. Louis, not Boston. … And don’t forget, The Curse wasn’t broken just because the Red Sox beat the Yankees.

Prediction: Cardinals in five games.

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