We had a spring break ritual at my house. Shopping. Spring or Christmas break, or July school clothes sprees, were all good times to hit an outlet mall.
Still operating as if I had fidgety youngsters, I strictly limited my shopping time at Factory Stores in North Bend. For after-Christmas sales, I invited my friend, Michelle, to join me on an outlet jaunt. She agreed to follow the rules, buckle up, and not touch the radio dial. I told her she had one and a half hours to get through all the North Bend stores.
Ninety minutes, take it or leave it.
Michelle is more of a leisurely browser so she didn’t get to visit all the shops. Why would someone limit a shopping spree? One must beat I-405 traffic, so the trip needs to be compact, after the early morning rush and before the afternoon commute. If you want pancakes at the former Mar T Cafe in North Bend, featured in the old TV show "Twin Peaks," you need to allow extra minutes for pouring syrup.
Don’t even think about pulling off I-90 to see Snoqualmie Falls.
On a recent day off, my husband, Chuck, and my middle son Brody, successfully kept to my time schedule on a trip to North Bend. Brody was instructed for days beforehand to be watching out his apartment window for our 9 a.m. arrival. He did as he was told. He is a good boy and understands mothers need to control.
We got to North Bend at 9:52 a.m., eight minutes ahead of schedule. Chuck said I should park on the north side of the mall but I had already decided to park at the south end. I mapped out a route from north to south so we could end at the car.
Chuck knew better than to try to change my mind.
As we pulled into a vacant spot, Brody was talking on his cell phone to his girlfriend, Lisa. He said on the ride to North Bend that Lisa, who had to work that day, would not have been able to stick to the hour and a half shopping schedule.
Lisa is like Michelle. They like to get clear to the back of each store. I didn’t understand that concept. Usually, clearance racks are grouped at the front.
"Honey, do you want anything at Gap?" I heard Brody ask Lisa. "Do you need anything at Black and Decker?"
That was pretty funny, because Lisa doesn’t shop for outlet tools, but I had scant time to laugh. The "Open" sign was sliding into place at Van Heusen.
Following another of my shopping rules, the men were not allowed to accompany me from store to store. I wanted half-off stationery. Chuck wanted a frying pan. The lists did not mesh. Brody agreed to walk around with his father. It wasn’t like Brody was in a rush. He knew that none of the store shirts would fit him. At 6 feet 4 inches tall, with long arms, normal shirts hit three inches above his wrist.
We synchronized watches and parted company. Zip zip, I was in and out of Adidas, Bass, Big Dog Sportswear, Book Warehouse, and the Dress Barn Woman’s Outlet. I don’t think Dress Barn is a great name to call a women’s clothing store. Moooooooooo. I grabbed a set of sheets at Fieldcrest Cannon and tried on size 8s at Famous Footwear.
I zoomed past the men outside OshKosh B’Gosh, but we exchanged no pleasantries. I would check out their bags later. There were only 27 minutes left to get through Nike and the Sunglass Hut.
After exactly ninety minutes, we met back at the car. We headed home, as planned, well before afternoon I-405 traffic. If you take the kids to North Bend this week, remember, children need structure. Limiting time restricts opportunities for them to hide under clothing racks.
My friend, Michelle, is planning a trip to Oregon. I told her how to get to Columbia Gorge Premium Outlets in Troutdale, only 20 minutes east of Portland.
She will love making tax-free purchases.
She will not miss me.
Kristi O’Harran’s column appears Tuesdays and Fridays. If you have an idea for her, call 425-339-3451 or e-mail oharran@heraldnet.com.
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