Stop and think about it: There’s a lot to think about

  • Larry Simoneaux / Freelance Columnist
  • Sunday, April 23, 2006 9:00pm
  • Opinion

Some things to think about:

* You do realize that, somewhere, there’s an individual sitting on a beach, soaking up the sun and sipping pina-coladas every day of the week? He or she is the person that said, “Hell, just give them the printers. We’ll put two ink cartridges in the things, fill them with about a tablespoon of ink, make them virtually non-refillable, adjust the flow so that they run out quickly, and price them at about 40 bucks apiece. We’ll make a mint.”

* The median price of a single-family home in King County just hit $405,000. We haven’t quite gotten there yet in Snohomish County, but we might want to start thinking about what we’re going to do when young people begin voting with their feet in order to find affordable housing.

* In any argument, whenever someone starts messing with the meaning of words, you can bet they’re trying to hide a basic flaw in their premise. One current example of this has to do with the immigration problem. The proper term for those who’ve broken the law to get here is “illegal aliens.” They are not “undocumented workers” or any of the other descriptive term now in vogue. Any honest debate regarding how to resolve this entire mess begins with that one simple fact.

* We’ve just finished another tax season. Did anyone else sign their return with fingers crossed and a prayer on their lips in hopes that it was all correct? I guarantee that, in the next election, if someone runs a dried-up, cross-eyed, three-legged cow with “flat tax” painted on her side, that cow gets my vote.

* In any large organization, you’ll usually find that there’s never enough time to do it right but always enough time to do it over – two or three times.

* Someone once noted that if humans were intended to be vegetarians, we’d all have flat teeth, more stomachs, look a lot dumber than we already do, and not salivate at the sight of a cheeseburger. Be honest, when was the last time you had the “hungries” for a helping of bean curd?

* In general, if you want to know how long a meeting really needs to last, divide the schedule by two and change the unit of time to the next lowest measure. Thus, a two-day meeting should actually last one hour – tops.

* A friend who lives in Atlanta and works for a major computer company tells me that the reason the British don’t make computers is that they can’t figure out how to make them leak oil.

* There’ve always been those willing to argue that Roger Maris didn’t really break Babe Ruth’s record because it took him 162 games to get 61 homers whereas Ruth hit his 60 in154 games. Good arguments can be found on both sides of that fence. These days, though, athletes are breaking records with more chemicals in them than a drug store pharmacy. Get out the asterisks, folks, because if a player needs a chemical company’s help to break a record, there’s no argument involved. It’s just not real.

* Whenever any government official is asked if we’re going to secure our borders, listen to the answer. If that answer isn’t simply “yes,” the answer is “no.”

* There are, in fact, simple solutions to many complex problems. The courage to go out and implement those solutions is what’s in short supply.

* Most things are easier to get into than out of and, once into, they always get worse under pressure.

* I think a very strong case could be made for the idea that many members of the “Baby Boomer” generation will spend most of the money they accumulated in a losing effort to convince themselves they’re not getting old. Kind of sad if you ask me.

* Ever notice that rolling around in the grass with a dog can make even the most depressing days a bit better?

* Jesse Jackson should, occasionally, just shut up. Bill Cosby, however, needs to be heard everywhere.

* Show of hands from all those who think that political campaigns should not be allowed to begin more than 60 days prior to any election. We could make it a law. The punishment for ignoring said law would to force the offenders to sit through all of the French entries in any film festival.

* If there were a device that could shoot 100,000 volts through the telephone and into the brains of telemarketers who called while we were eating dinner, how many millions do you think they’d sell in the first week?

Just thinking out loud here.

Larry Simoneaux lives in Edmonds. Comments can be sent to

Talk to us

More in Opinion

FILE — In this Sept. 17, 2020 file photo, provided by the Idaho Department of Fish and Game, Chelbee Rosenkrance, of the Idaho Department of Fish and Game, holds a male sockeye salmon at the Eagle Fish Hatchery in Eagle, Idaho. Wildlife officials said Tuesday, Aug. 10, 2021, that an emergency trap-and-truck operation of Idaho-bound endangered sockeye salmon, due to high water temperatures in the Snake and Salomon rivers, netted enough fish at the Granite Dam in eastern Washington, last month, to sustain an elaborate hatchery program. (Travis Brown/Idaho Department of Fish and Game via AP, File)
Editorial: Pledge to honor treaties can save Columbia’s salmon

The Biden administration commits to honoring tribal treaties and preserving the rivers’ benefits.

Editorial cartoons for Monday, Oct. 2

A sketchy look at the news of the day.… Continue reading

Patricia Gambis, right, talks with her 4-year-old twin children, Emma, left, and Etienne in their home, Thursday, Jan. 24, 2019, in Maplewood, N.J. Gambis' husband, an FBI agent, has been working without pay during the partial United States government shutdown, which has forced the couple to take financial decisions including laying off their babysitter. (AP Photo/Julio Cortez)
Editorial: Shutdown hits kids, families at difficult moment

The shutdown risks food aid for low-income families as child poverty doubled last year and child care aid ends.

Sen. June Robinson, D-Everett, left, and Sen. Mark Mullet, D-Issaquah, right, embrace after a special session to figure out how much to punish drug possession on Tuesday, May 16, 2023, in Olympia, Wash. Without action, Washington's drug possession law will expire July 1, leaving no penalty in state law and leaving cities free to adopt a hodgepodge of local ordinances.  (Karen Ducey/The Seattle Times via AP)
Editorial: Robinson smart choice to head Senate budget panel

A 10-year legislative veteran, the Everett senator displays a mastery of legislation and negotiation.

Randall Tharp’s month recovery coins after battling a fentanyl addiction.  (Kevin Clark / The Herald)
Fentanyl crisis should force rethinking of approach

A continuum of care, that includes treatment in jails, is imperative, says a journalist and author.

Comment: Online retailers should follow FTC’s lead in Amazon suit

The antitrust suit provides a rule book on how to incentivize rather than punish sellers and customers.

Comment: Starbucks’ reusuable cups aren’t so climate-friendly

Some reusable products generate more emissions than the disposable items they’re meant to replace.

Comment: Parental vigilance of social media can go too far

A shift from “monitoring” to “mentoring” can allow teens to learn to make their own wise choices.

Eco-nomics: Climate report card: Needs more effort but shows promise

A UN report shows we’re not on track to meet goals, but there are bright spots with clean energy.

Most Read