The headlines read, “Accused rapist arrested! Prosecutor says DNA testing leads to positive ID.”
We all breathe a sigh of relief. Thank God they caught the guy.
Well, listen up, folks. For every predator taken off the street, there are many ready to take his place. They are kind of like rats: just because one is caught, it doesn’t mean there aren’t more. Be aware, be vigilant, or be a victim. A few weeks ago, my husband and I went on some errands which included stopping at a large department store. He stayed in the car while I ran in to shop.
I browsed around the garden stuff and then headed towards the back of the store to the hardware and furniture departments. As I wandered down an aisle, I became aware of a man striding towards me. It was startling because the area had been deserted but suddenly this man was halfway up the row. He made direct eye contact but did not slow down or smile. I looked away.
A minute or two and an aisle later, the same thing happened. Except this time, he said, “Hi,” looking straight into my eyes. For the third time, he came striding up the aisle looking directly at me. I was on the verge of laughing, but something stopped me. As he came closer, he slowed and said quietly, “Hello. How are you today?”
Such an irrational bolt of fear went through me that I have no coherent recall of exactly what, if anything, I replied. My mouth went dry and my heart started pounding. I knew I had to get out of there as quickly as possible and scurried across the back of the store looking for someone so I wouldn’t be so alone.
I argued with myself about reporting the incident. But when I located a clerk at the front of the store who had no customers, I asked her to call security and explained what happened. I gave security a description and asked to be escorted back to my car.
In talking with professionals, including a criminal psychologist and law enforcement personnel, very likely this incident could have had a very different outcome. The purpose of the eye-to-eye contact is to intimidate the victim and establish superiority, as in the animal kingdom. The one who looks away first is subservient; the other is the dominant controller. Once that order is established, the controller moves in for the kill.
Frankly, this was news to me. I assumed most attacks are carried out by someone jumping from a hiding place. I never expected to be threatened in broad daylight in a popular department store.
The best answer lies in education and self-defense. Education means simply being aware there are people out there who will not hesitate to humiliate, injure or kill you to satisfy fantasy, greed or a violent urge. Doesn’t matter whether he is a flasher, a purse-snatcher, rapist, murderer, or all of the above. Be on your guard everywhere you go. Even, as we know from recent headlines, in your own front yard.
Maniacs know no rules, no laws and no boundaries. If you feel threatened, yell, scream, and get away as quickly as you can.
Clinton
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