SEATTLE – Traffic’s a mess. Worse than usual. It must be … Monday Night Football.
Everyone’s being very civil, though. “You (bleeping-bleep), where’d you get your driver’s license, out of a bowl of cereal?”
Well, almost everyone.
Civility reigns inside Qwest Field.
5:20 p.m. – The crowd lets go with a chorus of boos. Surprisingly, it’s the Cowboys, not the Seahawks, they’re booing, as the visitors come onto the field.
5:21 – “That’ll change,” someone cracks.
5:25 – Darrell Jackson catches a pass. Only one problem: It’s 35 minutes ‘til kickoff.
5:34 – Another round of boos as the Cowboys leave the field. Shaun Alexander waves his arms and yells, “Now stop that.”
5:40 – Jerheme Urban looks like the second coming of Jerry Rice in warmups. Is Monday Night Football his coming out party?
6 p.m. – “Six o’clock and the Seahawks haven’t shown up yet. That’d be two weeks in a row,” a waggish fellow quips.
6:01 – He spoke too soon. The old man’s the first Hawk player on the field. He turns, raises his arms to the crowd. Jerry Rice looks like the second coming of Jerheme Urban as he races onto the field.
6:06 – Dallas wins the toss, takes the ball.
6:10 – The crowd’s going nuts. Touchdown Seahawks? No, Edgar Martinez just raised the 12th Man Flag.
6:12 – First play for Seahawks and Darrell Jackson catches a 9-yard pass. Who says this guy doesn’t have sure hands?
6:14 – Rice is interferred with in the end zone. Throw the flag, ya bum! Rice doesn’t need any stinking flag. He catches the ball anyway. Hawks lead, 7-0.
6:17 – Nice tackle by the Hawks’ Ken Hamlin. Unfortunately, it comes after Julius Jones gains 53 yards.
6:25 – Rice is nice. Beautiful all-hands 17-yard diving catch by the 42-year-old as he streaks up the sideline. Showtime, baby, showtime.
6:31 – Jackson scores but doesn’t do a Terrell Owens Sharpie routine. Just casually flips the ball into the crowd. Come on, Darrell, jazz it up. Coach won’t mind.
6:42 – Cowboys punt on fourth-and-one at their own 40. What a wuss, that Bill Parcells.
6:44 – La’Roi Glover and Hawks quarterback Matt Hasselbeck are on a first-name basis after one quarter. That’s what two sacks will do for a relationship.
6:46 – Hawks win … the first quarter, 14-3.
6:58 – Urban catches a pass, starts to run, is hit and … there goes his coming-out party … fumbles.
7:06 – Vinny Testaverde is 41, but, like Rice, can still play this game. Touchdown, Cowboys, Testaverde to Terrance Copper.
7:10 – Parcells a wuss? Forget that. Cowboys go for two. Shoulda stayed a wuss, Bill. Cowboys stopped. Hawks still lead, 14-12.
7:12 – Is Jackson focused or what? With two guys about to squeeze him, he makes a sideline catch just before getting smeared. And holds onto the ball.
7:14 – Dropped pass. Jackson? No. Alexander. Boos. “Criticize us for getting on you,” Hawks fans grouse.
7:15 – Hawks face fourth-and-one at the Dallas 39. “Go, go, go, go,” the crowd chants. After a timeout, they do. No wuss, this Mike Holmgren. So what’s wrong with being a wuss? Hasselbeck fumbles the snap, Cowboys’ ball.
7:25 – Hawk defenders look as if they’re playing touch football. Only nobody lays a hand on Julius Jones as he bursts up the middle for an 8-yard touchdown.
7:35 – Half ends with Cowboys on top, 19-14. Fans in top form vocally. BOOOOOOO.
7:45 – Fans chant “pass rush, pass rush” as teams return to field. “What’s that?” Hawks ask.
7:49 – Can you say, “Hold onto the stinking ball?” Alexander can’t. Fumbles at the Hawks 21.
7:50 – The Hawks can’t keep up with the Joneses. Julius, that is. He scores again.
7:51 – Can you say, “Not ready for prime-time?” Hawks down, 26-14.
7:56 – Grant Wistrom whispers in Testaverde’s ear. “Thought about retirement? No? Well, think about it, dammit.”
8:05 – Hawks can’t stop Jones, but a hankie does. Penalty, Cowboys, no touchdown.
8:07 – Miracle of miracles. Hawks hold Cowboys to a field goal.
8:20 – Miracle of miracles: Hawks score a field goal.
8:29 – Marcus Trufant makes a textbook tackle. Unfortunately, he makes it while Copper’s trying to catch a pass. First down, Cowboys, at Hawks 33.
8:40 – Testaverde throws a perfect strike to … Terreal Bierria. That’s showing your age, Vinny.
8:42 – Hawks fourth-and-goal at the 1. Alexander doesn’t fumble this time. We’ve got a game, Cowboys lead 29-24.
8:50 – Planets collide. Hawks get a sack.
8:55 – Seattle’s gonna win this thing.
8:58 – Because Jerheme Urban says so. His 19-yard touchdown reception puts Hawks up 32-29.
8:59 – ABC wanted an entertaining show. And they got it.
9:05 – Hawks get an interception from Ken Hamlin with 4:23 to go.
9:12 – Mack Strong does what he does best: Supplies a gut-busting block to clear the path for an Alexander TD. Game’s in the bag, Hawks up 39-29.
9:17 – Oh, yeah? Nobody told the Cowboys. Testaverde hooks up with Keyshawn Johnson for a TD.
9:18 – Dallas tries an onside kick with 1:45 to go. Dallas recovers an onside kick.
9:19 – Cowboy ball at Seattle 17. “Watch out for the Jones cat. Watch out for the Jones … oh, forget it.”
9:30 – Hasselbeck lets fly with a “Hail Mary” into the end zone. Bodies go up. Bodies come down. And nobody catches the ball.
9:32 – The Hawks lose another game they should have won, 43-39.
9:44 – Seattle coach Mike Holmgren says the loss might “end up hurting us.”
9:44 – Might?
9:45 – Let’s hear that old refrain, Hawk fans. “Wait til next year.”