Too Human reviewed… and it gets ugly.

  • Thursday, August 21, 2008 10:55am
  • Sports

After ten years of developmental limbo, after ten years of reviewers playing snippets of the game and declaring it an unqualified success, after ten long years Silicon Knights has finally released Too Human to the fawning masses.

Personally, I would have gladly waited 10 more if that means Dennis Dyack would get it right. Maybe if he spent less time trolling forums and spent more time with his development team this game would have been the critical success he envisioned.

Right now, Too Human is Too Bad.

Too Human is an RPG style “brawler” that re-invisions Norse mythology ala Tron, as the gods themselves are cybernetically enhanced beings who must repel a machine invasion that threatens the realms of man. As Baldur, you are able to select five skill trees to customize yourself, which are berserker, defender, champion, commando, and bioengineer.

Sounds good? That’s the problem – the game has always sounded good when reviewed piecemeal but in actuality, the game is a mess.

Graphically it is superior and makes the most of the Xbox 360’s hardware, but the game play – if not the story – are simplistic at best and underdone at worst. While there may be five classes in the game, the mobs you fight are all dealt with in the same manner no matter what class you may be. Melee fights are fun, and once you get into a pattern and start juggling the mobs you begin to see where the game might become fun. But ranged weapons are clumsy and do not target other mobs as quickly as you need them to.

Perhaps the most annoying feature of this game occurs in death, which triggers an insufferably long resurrection sequence as a cybernetic Valkyrie comes to give you a new lease on life. This cannot be skipped. At first it was annoying, but then I decided to play a new game: how many things can I do during a long and insufferable cut scene. Let’s see; I did some laundry, made a sandwich, vacuumed my room, and unloaded the dishwasher. Hurray for chores, boo for fun.

Another aspect of this game that annoys me to no end is the controls. Combat is basically controlled by the right analog stick of your Xbox 360 controller. Yes, when you move the stick, you attack.

Is it me or is that just a little too simplistic? Why not just slave combat controls to the start button? Hit start = you win. Manual dexterity and skill doesn’t seem too important when you can play this game with your feet.

This game is a rental at most and at the very least a pass. I would only recommend it to people who have cut me off in traffic or talk during movies.

Mmmmmm… “sandvich.” Team Fortress 2 Heavy players just got a shot in the arm. Always entertaining Valve released an update today that saw the tank-like Heavy recive some interesting updates: “Natasha,” a new mini-gun that actually slows down opponents; the “Killing Gloves of Boxing” which extends gives the Heavy five-seconds of gaurunteed crits; and “The Sandvich.”

Ah, the sandvich.

The sandvich will replenish the Heavy’s health by 120 points. Great for playing defense, but beware: the Heavy is basically incapacitated for four seconds while he eats, leaving him vulnerable to… well… everything.

Here’s the Valve video for the sandvich. Beware, hilarity ensues.

Talk to us

> Give us your news tips.

> Send us a letter to the editor.

> More Herald contact information.

More in Sports

Silvertips forward Carter Bear fields questions after the Detroit Red Wings selected him 13th overall in the 2025 NHL Entry Draft in Los Angeles on June 27, 2025. (Photo courtesy Natalie Shaver / CHL)
Two weeks after Draft, Silvertips’ Bear still can’t believe it

The Red Wings’ first-rounder reflects on draft night and his experience at Detroit’s development camp.

Storm flies too close to the Sun, loses in an upset

Connecticut snapped a 10-game losing streak to beat Seattle 93-83 on Wednesday morning.

Giancarlo Stanton of the New York Yankees flips his bat after hitting a three-run home run in the sixth inning against the Seattle Mariners at Yankee Stadium on Tuesday, July 8, 2025, in New York. (Evan Bernstein / Getty Images / Tribune News Services)
Raleigh, Judge heat up homer race at Yankee Stadium

In the battle of baseball’s biggest sluggers, Aaron Judge… Continue reading

Seattle Seahawks linebackers Derick Hall (58) and Boye Mafe (53) celebrate a defensive play during the 2024 season. (Rio Giancarlo / Getty Images / The Athletic)
Season to reveal long-term plans for Seahawks linebackers

The Seattle Seahawks selected edge rusher Boye Mafe with… Continue reading

Silvertips defenseman wins U20 Ball Hockey World Title with Canada

Rylan Pearce helps Canada win gold at the ISBHF U20 World Championships in Slovakia.

Seattle Seahawks wide receiver Doug Baldwin (89) makes a catch against San Francisco 49ers defensive back Rashard Robinson (33) in the second quarter at Levi's Stadium in Santa Clara, Calif., on Sunday, Jan. 1, 2017. (Nhat V. Meyer / Bay Area News Group / Tribune News Services)
Sports psychologist changed Seahawks’ Doug Baldwin’s outlook

The former receiver overcame intense emotions during his player career

Paolo Banchero, Orlando agree to max contract extension

The former O’Dea star could earn up to $287 million over five years.

NHL players, owners vote to ratify 4-year CBA

Notable changes include an 84-game season starting in 2026, shorter contract terms.

AquaSox outfielder Carson Jones gets settled in the batter's box during Everett's 4-3 loss to the Vancouver Canadians at Funko Field on July 6, 2025. (Joe Pohoryles / The Herald)
AquaSox show progress, but drop fifth straight to Canadians

Jones’ go-ahead, 3-run homer is spoiled in 4-3 loss to wrap up homestand.

Bryan Woo of the Seattle Mariners delivers a pitch in the first inning against the Toronto Blue Jays at Rogers Centre on Friday, April 18, 2025, in Toronto. (Vaughn Ridley / Getty Images / Tribune News Services)
Three Mariners added to MLB All-Star Game

Major League Baseball announced today that Mariners outfielder Julio Rodríguez,… Continue reading

George Kirby (68) of the Seattle Mariners pitches in the third inning against the Pittsburgh Pirates at T-Mobile Park on Sunday, July 6, 2025, in Seattle. (Alika Jenne / Getty Images / Tribune News Services)
Pirates finish historically bad offensive series in Seattle

Similar to the first two games of the series, the… Continue reading

Seattle Storm forward Alysha Clark (32) and Aces guard Jewell Loyd (24) guard each other during a free throw in a WNBA basketball game between the Aces and the Seattle Storm at Michelob ULTRA Arena Friday, June 20, 2025, in Las Vegas. (Madeline Carter / Las Vegas Review-Journal / Tribune News Services)
Storm uses third-quarter thunderbolt to down Liberty

Rookie Dominique Malonga scored 11 and took over in the third quarter for Seattle.

Support local journalism

If you value local news, make a gift now to support the trusted journalism you get in The Daily Herald. Donations processed in this system are not tax deductible.