This article is dedicated to those who at some point in life (or perhaps their entire lives) have been stuck in the diet/binge cycle.

The definition of binge eating is the consumption of large quantities of food in a very short period of time, to the point of physical discomfort. This is different from occasionally eating too much, say during a holiday.

Binge eaters feel like they cannot stop even though they are uncomfortably full, and the shame that accompanies this uncontrolled eating is tremendous. The ability to eat like a “normal” person has vanished. Food rules your life, and it’s all or nothing: Gorge or deprive.

After a binge, many eaters then swing to the opposite side of the spectrum and severely restrict calories, hoping to negate any weight gain their binge may have caused.

I was married to the diet/binge cycle in my early 20s. Recently, I came across some old notes I had written when I was in the throes of it — desperately out of control and feeling like I was powerless over what I put into my mouth.

Reading the notes, I see a lot of wisdom in them.

My realizations:

“Without dieting, there is no binge eating.”

This was a profound recognition for me. We battle binge eating with dieting, thinking we will binge forever if we do not control it with deprivation. The exact opposite is true. Dieting is the creator of binge eating. The more I punished my body by not feeding it, the more viciously my body retaliated with uncontrollable cravings and overeating. The way to stop binge eating is by giving up low-cal dieting. It worked for me, but talking myself into believing this truth was an arduous feat, as I was utterly addicted to dieting.

“I have dieted my way to fatness.”

Dieters, think of how much you weighed the very first time you started a deprivation diet. I was 12 years old and 110 pounds. I yo-yo dieted for the next eight years and only got fatter. Had I just cleaned up my eating instead of dieting (more on the difference between the two in a future article), I am certain my weight would not have spiraled out of control.

“Dieting is profoundly addictive and seductive.”

Dieting seduced me into believing I would be so much happier, stronger and in control if I could muster up enough willpower and self-respect to banish sugar and subside on celery sticks and protein shakes.

In fact, I was utterly out of control.

My body wouldn’t stand for low-cal dieting, and I was furious with it for fighting me. What a hopeless and cruel battle I was carrying out!

”If I continue to hop on the deprivation diet train, I do so knowing that my body will win this war I’ve waged on it. Every time.” This seemingly grim conclusion was my turning point, and it led to the first loving promise I made to myself: I will always allow myself to eat when hungry.

“B.I.N.G.E. Because I’m Not Good Enough.” I did not come up with this acronym myself, but I agree with it. At the core of my diet/binge eating era was the belief that I was not good enough the way I was. My attempt to become worthy via barely eating only made me fatter and more depressed.

If any of my struggles strike a chord with you, be assured there is hope. It is possible to unlearn all the diet b.s. that our culture has taught us, to embrace a new way of eating consciously, and to stop eating when we are satisfied. But to do so, you must first end your torrid affair with dieting. This takes time, patience, and effort.

Most of all, it requires self-love. And you are worth loving, reader.

This article is not intended to be a substitute for medical advice. If you feel you have an eating disorder, seek help from your physician or health provider.

Catherine Bongiorno, info@lifttolose.com, is a Mukilteo personal trainer and nutritional therapist who owns Lift To Lose Fitness &Nutrition, www.lifttolose.com.