Mr. T pitied a room full of TV critics, or professional “couch potatoes,” this morning to promote his upcoming show on TV Land. Big surprise here, it’s called, “I Pity the Fool.”

Some highlights:

Question: Mr. T, why do you pity the fool?

Mr. T: That’s a good question, and I’m glad I have the opportunity to answer it. … You can’t just beat up the fool because he don’t know any better. So you pity him. … Fools, you have to give another chance, because they don’t know any better.”

In his show, Mr. T is a self-styled inspirational guru with what he calls a “street degree.” He travels the country and helps “fools” deal with their problems.

“My show ain’t no Dr. Phil, where people are crying, ‘What’s wrong with me, Dr. Phil? What’s wrong with me, Dr. Phil?’ You’re a fool, that’s what’s wrong with you.”

Awesome.

And, for those scoring at home, the “T” stands for “tough” and “tender” and “temperature, because I bring the heat.”

Soon, though, it got a little crazy. The “T” now stands for “nice, manners, being polite, working hard, loving thy neighbor, feeding the hungry … the ‘T’ stands for just being a nice guy.”

And he is. What a tremendous experience to share a room with the guy who truly seems to mean well.

His show is scheduled to premiere on TV Land on Oct. 4.