As a busy working mom who doesn’t always have time to cook, I appreciate a short cut in the kitchen as much as the next girl. But there is a limit to how far I’ll bend in the direction of convenience. Even at my most frazzled, I can’t imagine sending my kids off to school with this latest offering from Kraft warming their bellies: Bagel-fuls.
Talk about unappetizing and lazy: these Twinkie-like frozen bagel “logs” come prestuffed with Philadelphia cream cheese. Just throw one in the microwave or toaster oven and, presto chango! Breakfast with a guaranteed bellyache.
And I thought Uncrustables — those flying saucer-shaped, premade peanut butter-and-jelly sandwiches in your grocer’s freezer section — were ridiculous.
One person’s definition of dumb, of course, is another’s can’t-live-without time-saver — and with so many of us struggling to balance work, school and activities, the siren call of convenience is stronger than ever.
But seriously, people: Are we so rushed in the morning that we don’t have a minute to spread peanut butter and jelly on two pieces of bread and toss it into a plastic bag? In the time it takes to open each individual Bagel-ful packet and nuke it to life, couldn’t you schmear a little Philly on the real thing? Where’s your pride in the kitchen?
I’m no purist. One of my favorite dinners on soccer/guitar lessons night is the frozen General Tso’s Chicken from Sam’s Club. It’s not as healthful and tasty as food you make from scratch, but I can get it on the table in 15 minutes, or about the time it takes to make rice in a rice cooker. I paid $10.28 a box — a lot cheaper than ordering Chinese takeout. I’m also partial to Trader Joe’s precooked, vacuum-packed organic brown rice ($1.69 for 10.5 ounces). Why spend 45 minutes cooking something your kids probably aren’t going to eat anyway when you can heat it up in the microwave in 90 seconds?
Plenty of people I know take similar short cuts. One co-worker swears by Bob Evans’ Original Mashed Potatoes (the refrigerated ones, not the kind that come in a box) because the made-from-scratch variety “are such a pain to make.” Another has a daughter who couldn’t live without the “hideously expensive” precut fruit at Whole Foods. Still another brews premeasured, single-serving Gavalia coffee “pods” in a Braun Tassimo espresso/coffee maker he found in an editor’s office. At about 50 cents per cup, it’s tons more expensive than brewing a traditional pot of coffee at home. But you know what? It’s good, and no mess.
What else gets a resounding thumbs up? Having grown up on mushy canned fruits and vegetables, I’m generally skeptical of anything that doesn’t come straight from a garden or orchard. But I’m a real fan of Green Giant’s new microwavable Valley Fresh Steamers veggies ($2.39 for a 10-ounce bag). I also like the new 100-calorie snack packs from Nabisco. They’re a good way to have a cookie without feeling guilty.
Other shortcut items I’m willing to pay more for include peeled baby carrots, Sargento mild cheddar cheese cubes, individual bags of chips and pretzels (they don’t seem to crush as easily as snacks repackaged in a plastic sandwich bag) and Delmonte fruit cups, especially mandarin oranges. All are great for school lunches and quick snacks.
Not so great are Oscar Mayer’s prepackaged Lunchables, something my kids beg me for whenever there’s a field trip at school. Not only are they chock-full of fat and sodium (the Nachos lunch packs 590 calories and 920 milligrams of salt while the Maxed Out Chicken Strips contains 490 calories and 900 milligrams of salt), but most varieties are just plain gross. Please tell me how a cracker topped with cold tomato sauce and unmelted cheese even remotely resembles a pizza!
The new Lunchables Wrapz don’t sound much better. Sure, the grilled-chicken product counts just 390 calories. But read the back of the box, parents. Each meal has more than 100 ingredients. And most of them sound more like something you’d find in chemistry class than in a garden.
Also getting a big thumb down are Pillsbury Toaster Scrambles ($2.99/four), a Pop Tart-like breakfast pastry filled with some kind of funky cheese sauce, one of three breakfast meats and “real” scrambled eggs. Sure, you can wrap it in a napkin and eat it in the car, but do you really want to?
The award for least-appetizing convenience food, though, is probably Jimmy Dean’s Pancakes &Sausage on a Stick ($7.88/18 at Sam’s Club). I know the intent was to create utensil-free pigs-in-the-blanket dish you can eat as you go.
But microwaved pancakes? On a stick?
Have a little respect for yourself, people.
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