Frontiers of Public Education Dept.: In Galesburg, Ill., school authorities denied high school diplomas to five students. And why did they take this action? Were the kids caught drinking? Did they cheat on their finals? Did they bring firearms to school? No, no and no way. The Galesburg 5 were punished because their friends and family cheered them as they crossed the stage at commencement (http://www.heraldnet.com/stories/07/06/02/100wir_a6graduation001.cfm).

The wise men and women of Galesburg public schools ought to know by now that trying to keep teenage girls from emitting those keening squeals of joy is like trying to stop a puppy from piddling in the house.

Stoners in Minnesota have a problem: Not only has their weed connection dried up, but also their source of Jawbreakers.

That’s because lawmen near St. Paul seized 1 1/2 tons of pot hidden amid a 40,000-pound load of the tooth-cracking candy (http://www.heraldnet.com/stories/07/06/02/100wir_a2drugs001.cfm).

Police considered giving the candy away to kids, but decided that would violate the War on Drugs in some way. So the Jawbreakers will probably be incinerated.

Stop joking about Canadian money — it’s almost on a par with the slumping U.S. dollar (http://www.heraldnet.com/stories/07/06/02/100bus_loonie001.cfm). This means Vancouver really is the San Francisco of Canada.

— Mark Carlson, Herald staff