Burke: Snake oil is still out there; with fine print attached

By Tom Burke

Herald columnist

Hey, wanna feel better? Afraid you’ll get an ache or pain someday soon? How about living longer, healthier, smarter?

I got just the thing for you!

Yes, for only pennies a day (OK, a lot of pennies a day, adding up to more than $35 billion in sales a year) you can get, say the manufacturers, “Better joint comfort and support five signs of joint health.” Or, “support heart, artery and bone health.”

And if you want to “Own your health,” for just a few dollars more you can buy “5-HTP Plus for a Relaxed Mood” or “Melatonin for better sleep,” or “Biotin for healthy hair, skin & nails.”

Operators are standing by.

But hey, did you know that, “These statements have not been evaluated by the Food and Drug Administration. These products are not intended to diagnose, treat, cure or prevent any disease.”

Say what?

Do you mean their ingredients and health claims are totally unregulated; and these “medicines” aren’t medicines at all.

Yep.

And they are, legally, “dietary/nutritional supplements” and are the modern equivalent of Clark Stanley’s famous “Snake Oil Liniment” of the 1890s.

Indeed.

Which means, legally, they don’t have to do anything at all. For you. Or anybody. Ever.

Bingo.

Wait, did you really just say these products are “not intended to diagnose, treat, cure or prevent any disease?”

You read it right.

And while they talk about “expanded blood flow;” “helping the body transport calcium effectively,” “Improves memory and concentration,” call themselves “immune enhancers,” and say they, “May help reduce cholesterol” — and they sure sound like treatments and disease prevention — they don’t do any of that stuff?

Ahhh, you’re catching on.

Now, aside from their dubious efficacy, the two things these products have in common: the sharp use of the Dietary Supplement Health and Education Act of 1994 and the use of “weasel words,” what folks in the advertising business invented to turn potentially illegal claims into “harmless” boasts and transform serious-sounding ad copy into pap. And keep their makers out of court and out of the clutches of the Federal Trade Commission and the Federal Drug Administration.

Words like “may,” (not will, but kinda, sorta, might) and “help” (as in aiding and abetting, not actually guaranteeing action) sound like they’re promising a lot, but in fact, promise nothing. They essentially absolve manufacturers from the consequences of any harm their products might do or, importantly, from the consequences that these products do absolutely nothing at all.

So, what’s the answer to the question: will I live longer, be healthier, and stay sharp if I take dietary supplements?

You might. Or you might not. Nobody knows, least of all the manufacturers.

Just read their small print.

“XXX products should not be confused with prescription medicine. XXX products should not be used as a substitute for medically supervised therapy. If you suspect you suffer from clinical deficiencies, consult a licensed, qualified medical doctor.

(In other words, if you have a problem, see a doctor, don’t take the stuff we’re selling.)

It goes on, “None of the information is intended to be an enticement to purchase and may not be construed as medical advice or instruction.”

(It sure sounds like medical advice. And if your ad isn’t an enticement to purchase, what is it? A Happy Birthday message?)

And then they tell you, “No action should be taken solely on its content; regardless of the perceived scientific merit. … The use of any nutritional supplement for any reason, other than to increase dietary intake levels of specific nutrients, is neither, implied nor advocated by XXX Corp.”

(So no matter how much good we say our stuff will do, we don’t really mean it. All we’re legally claiming: Product X will increase the amount of “whatever” we put in the bottle, in your body. Nothing more.)

So before you plunk down your money and pluck up some pills, find out about them.

Consumer Reports says, “Not only are the advertised ingredients of some supplements potentially dangerous, but because of the way they’re regulated, you often have no idea what you’re actually ingesting.”

And another Harvard guy, Bryn Austin, a professor in the department of Social and Behavioral Sciences at Harvard’s T.H. Chan School of Public Health, says, “No supplements are prescreened for efficacy and safety by the government. The FDA is reactive. Because of the way Congress ties their hands, they have to wait until there’s serious harm: deaths, injury, liver damage, transplants. Most consumers don’t realize their lives are on the line before the government steps in.”

Regular readers know I abhor lies, falsehood and deceit, whether by a president or in product advertising. And most dietary supplements base their marketing on legal deceit, and only supplement their manufacturer’s bottom line. Not your health.

Caveat emptor.

Tom Burke’s email address is t.burke.column@gmail.com.