I’m with the band

With a little help from your friends: Former Beatles Paul McCartney and Ringo Starr reunited Monday to promote a new video game, “The Beatles: Rock Band” that, like other “Rock Band” games, allows anyone to play along to tunes with simplified instruments.

So you’ll need four friends: Yourself and three others to play John, Paul, George and Ringo, and one to play Yoko to break up the band at the end of the evening.

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In the future, everyone will be infamous for 15 minutes: Scottish YouTube star Susan Boyle was admitted to a London clinic for exhaustion after her second-place finish on “Britain’s Got Talent.”

Already in the works is a video game, “Rock Band: Susan Boyle” that will post a video on YouTube of you singing a Broadway tune, after which hordes of British reporters will camp out on your front porch and ridicule you in the tabloids.

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Oh, say can you sing? About 90 percent of people coming into the U.S. from Canada have remembered to carry their passport or other approved identification, officials report.

Those who forget their passports will be allowed back in but must sing the correct lyrics to “The Star-Spangled Banner” using the video game “Rock Band: Impossible-to-Sing National Anthems.”