Special detention

Do Carhartts come in orange? The feds continued to keep their distance at a wildlife refuge on the frozen high desert of eastern Oregon on Monday, two days after an anti-government militia group seized the refuge’s visitors center.

The Buzz suggests that one non-violent way to resolve the standoff would be to build a razor-wire fence around the building and rename it “GITMO Oregon Annex.”

You can have any color as long as it’s red: Ferrari, maker of exotic Italian sports cars, has begun a new era as a stand-alone company trading on the stock market under the ticker symbol RACE.

A much more appropriate symbol would have been MIDLIFECRISIS, but ticker symbols can’t be longer than four characters.

I’ll have no backtalk from you, Unit No. XXL572.44: LG has made a new robotic vacuum cleaner that will redo its work if you tell it, “You missed a spot.”

If they want to make the robot more humanlike, they’ll program it to roll its eyes and sigh heavily before vacuuming the missed spot. Then it would not say a word or make any eye contact during dinner.

— Mark Carlson, Herald staff

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More in Opinion

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