Things are getting spooky

Halloween is almost upon us, which may explain a bunch of slightly spooky things in the news today. For instance:

  • The National UFO Reporting Center, a one-man operation that collects and publishes information about sightings, is busily setting up shop in a dilapidated nuclear missile site in Eastern Washington.

    If we were the guy working in that bunker, we’d be a lot less worried about aliens than about the oversized, many-eyed and many-legged creatures that might be staring at us from the corner.

  • An Everett woman’s shrimp snack was so light it glowed in the dark. According to the FDA, the crustaceans’ aura is a natural phenomenon and not, say, the result of exposure to wastewater from Hanford.

    Even if you’d rather not eat the shrimp, you might want to keep them around a couple more days. They could come in handy if stores are all out of glow sticks on Halloween night.

  • Bigfoot may be on the prowl in Pennsylvania. A hunter’s camera snapped shots of a mysterious furry creature that a member of the Bigfoot Research Organization believes is a young Sasquatch.

    However, an official with the state game commission said it was just a bear with a bad case of mange. If the official is never heard from again, we’ll know it really was a Sasquatch — and that he doesn’t like to be called names.

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