Trying hard to look like Gary Cooper

Please I beg you; for safety’s sake, don’t humiliate him: Microsoft’s Chief Executive Steve Ballmer, during the company’s annual pep rally for software developers, was more low-key than in years past when he has pranced around the stage hollering, “Developers! Developers!”

Instead Ballmer, who bears a striking resemblance to Peter Boyle’s monster in “Young Frankenstein,” donned top coat and tails and belted out “Putting on the Ritz.”

There’s an app, but no phone for that: During the conference Ballmer asked the developers for their “best work” in writing apps for the Windows Phone 7, Microsoft’s unreleased answer to the Apple iPhone and Google Android smart phones.

Developers started right to work on an app that displays an interactive map for locating recycling centers for Zune mp3 players.

Do you want thunder thighs with that? A Brazilian court has ordered McDonald’s to pay a former franchise manager $17,500 because he gained 65 pounds during his 12 years with the fast-food restaurant, saying he felt obligated to sample the food each day.

McDonald’s offered to settle the claim by writing the man a glowing recommendation if he applied for a job with Burger King or KFC.

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